...and so it goes.

On Mother's Day of 2006 I ventured into the world of blogging as the wait began for my daughter. Along the way I have met amazing women, seen the acme of joy and the depths of despair in so many lives - including my own. I completely enjoyed the outlet of blogging and the connections.

On that day in 2006, I entered into the adoption blog venue wide-eyed and innocent. I did not realize that the specter of the wait was just creeping into my life. Yet, in time, the wait became a distinct entity residing in my life. 'The Process' consumed me. Sure, I lived my life but there was a always a veiled cloud lingering nearby. Someone was missing for such a long, long time. Looking back I now know how much blogging was a coping outlet for me.

I always thought I would continue to blog and enjoy it even more once my daughter was a reality. Rather, I no longer have a life with much semblance to the one I had before. I am a busy mom with ever-more new chapters opening in my life. I'm not in a place where I need my coping technique of blogging anymore (for now). In fact, I have been vacillating for months about bringing the blog to an end. I often wondered if I would come to regret it. But, I know I do look at the idea of blogging as work now rather than a pleasure or therapeutic event. It shouldn't be that way to make sense in my book.

I recently had the chat with some friends who had experienced very similar feelings as life unfolds now that our daughters are home. I have decided, before I slack off and don't commit, that I am officially ending my time of active blogging. I won't pull this blog, for now, in case I do find that I would want to do some sporadic updates. As well, I will still be checking in on you through my reader. You just won't see me commenting much (which has been the case for several months anyway).

For those still waiting, I feel for you. I still remember that pain. But, the time will come. The pain will heal, each day a little more, as your child is finally a reality in your world.

For me, the ghosts of the past and the emotional demands of the wait have been chased away by one little girl. As her mom, I am going to leave that chapter behind and step fully into the future while grasping one tiny little hand.

Happy trails....